Adapting Curriculum to suit your child's own needs
How to Get that “WOW” moment
Curricular adaptation for parents and other regular people
S.T.A.P.L.E. is an acronym I developed to illustrate the steps in creating innovative and creative adaptations to existing curriculum for elementary education.
So you’ve found yourself in this new “club” the parent of a child with special needs. For the large majority of us, this is not a club we knowingly applied to, but wouldn’t/couldn’t now, withdraw from.
Well, welcome. I won’t lie to you, and tell you it’s easy and rewarding. It is somedays – but a lot of days it’s not. I have 4 sons and the “other” three are somewhat easier to deal with. Somewhat because all children are “special” some are just more “special” than others.
I had given birth to my second son, another beautiful healthy boy: Nathaniel Ryan Willard. As my husband and I celebrated our good fortune – at least 4 doctors and nurses entered the room. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know that there was something ‘wrong’. They proceeded to tell us that they thought Nate was born with Downs Syndrome. At the time I didn’t even know what downs syndrome was – I just knew by their presence in my room and the looks on their faces that it wasn’t good news , I had no idea what it would mean for my family and for Nate and then especially for me.–{ which was just as well, since then I had no preconceived ideas about his abilities or my own to handle this. Or lack thereof.
I want to write the book that would’ve given me a head start, or at least a head’s up, on following my own ideas and intuition regarding my son; his opportunities, his choices, his education etc. I have always hoped for Nate to have the same chances and choices, my first son Ross (and my subsequent other two sons) expected to have. I found out right away that there were plenty of people, nurses, educators, etc who had ‘plenty ‘ of preconceived notions of what Nate would be able to do, and therefore the choices he would be able to have and the doors of opportunity that would be open to him,
Here I was rejoicing in Nate’s birth, and trying to educate myself on kids ‘like” Nate, while the rest of our world = ,and with very few exceptions,-were bound and determined to let Mark and I know all kinds of irrelevant things that this ‘day old ‘ baby would ‘never ‘ be able to do.
I’ve met enough parents of special kids, or kids with ‘different types of learning styles to know we’ve all…..
….Been There - Felt and Done That...
I don’t know about you but sometimes having a child with special needs feels like you’ve entered The ‘Twilight Zone’ .
- everything that you do – feels like it's too little, and too late.
When, actually, we should be patting ourselves on the back for making a ‘new’ discovery –
but instead we spend time beating ourselves up
for not having figured it out sooner.
So now you’ve gone from the excitement of finding a new idea,
to ‘bad mother’ – in seconds flat.
why didn’t you figure this out sooner’ ?.
Time seems so precious that any lost time is terrible . a lost opportunity.
Remember the wizard of oz, when the neighbor turns into the witch while she’s pedaling her bicycle. There’s a song that plays in the back ground. That’s the sound I usually play in my head at these moments. It’s like you can’t peddle fast enough.
You don’t need to do this to yourself. We are our own worst enemy.
So take a real deep breath and relax. . . . . .
It feels as if there’s too much to do, and too little time.
But there is.
Time is on our side.
And patience is definitely a virtue you will come to make your friend. and eventually your bff
here are some of the False imprints we put on ourselves.
They are the experts – they must know better. (who ever the proverbial THEY are???)
What do I know I studied _____{fill in the blank}.
They have a degree (doctorate) in education, (inclusion, etc).
The truth is—yes, often you do know better.
Your are the expert on your child.
You know things that he/she will/can do , that no one else knows.
You spend the most time with him, know his/her likes and dislikes.
and YIKES . . . . . .what a responsibility.
Talk about pressure.
If you deign to take a break,, what opportunities are passing you by??!!
Try your best not to get in your own way.
Don’t make your best not good enough. - There is a learning curve here.
No one, not even the pro’s know what to do – exactly and when to do it.
Just like our typical children, each child with special needs is different, has his/her own personality, likes and dislikes.
Remember knowledge is power, and you can only learn as fast as you can, so try not to be your won worst enemy.
I’m not suggesting we don’t do therapy, don’t test, research or tutor. . . god knows where I’d be without my 2am searches on the internet, but as we finally come to know -
We are our child’s best advocate – and the best researcher he could possibly have.
We may not ultimately be our child’s best teacher, but we can be his teacher’s best resource. We can do research, find age appropriate reading – make copies, enlarge information, ask for funding for extra help, search the internet for information or source material. Find or make books on tape etc., - be a jack of all trades.
We are the thread that carries throughout. With our child, and with the team, day to day and from year to year.
“We tried this, last year, it didn’t work….it worked in English – can we use the same skills in science…..He/she responded to this – can we use this method in math. His/her favorite thing in the world is star wars, elmo, pokemon, (fill in the blank )
– how about star wars math?...... Use his or her favorite thing as a hook, or incitement to get them interested in something they would otherwise tune out or say no to.
The BIG PICTURE – THAT’S OUR JOB.
Where do we want to end up at the end of the day . . . where are we going.
What’s the important piece of this lesson. Is it writing your name in the upper right hand corner of the page or answering the question.
Does the answer need to be written – can it be multiple choice, done on the computer –
can we pick out the words on cut out paper – or with picture clues, etc.
My hope is that this book will give you the permission you seek and teach you how to use your other skills, as a parent, business professional, housewife or shoe salesman to help you to help your child.
There are no absolutes here. It’s definitely trial and error and what works one day may not work the next. But the same can be said for all children – learning is an ongoing an ananamorphosis process – your ideas and flexibility will be seen as an asset when given the chance.
Never does not mean Never...... Never will come to mean.... Not Yet.
It has for me, and it will for you.
You will need to learn to pick your battles. Every thing is not as important as the next thing.
Right away does not ,and can’t always mean now. You need to remember that 'they' almost always have good intentions and you’ll lose too much credibility if you approach the schools this way.
Truthfully –they do have our child’s best interest at heart. Sometimes good intentions are not enough – I agree – but their motives are in the right place – new things and change are hard for most adults – and at it’s core that is what we’re asking for – change. Of attitude, expectations, performance, outcome etc. They are not the enemy. They don’t have to like you – respecting your opinion and intentions would be nice – but your not looking for a date to the prom – you want to be a valued member of the team. This is a lot easier to accomplish then getting anyone to admit that you’re right – or to make it all better - etc. that’s not what this Is about. It’s about getting your child the kind of help he/she needs at this moment in time. Remember their needs will change – as it would for any child - with the passage of time.
Once you've successfully created your first AHA Moment, you will be hooked! I know I was - and I still am!
Well, welcome. I won’t lie to you, and tell you it’s easy and rewarding. It is somedays – but a lot of days it’s not. I have 4 sons and the “other” three are somewhat easier to deal with. Somewhat because all children are “special” some are just more “special” than others.
I had given birth to my second son, another beautiful healthy boy: Nathaniel Ryan Willard. As my husband and I celebrated our good fortune – at least 4 doctors and nurses entered the room. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know that there was something ‘wrong’. They proceeded to tell us that they thought Nate was born with Downs Syndrome. At the time I didn’t even know what downs syndrome was – I just knew by their presence in my room and the looks on their faces that it wasn’t good news , I had no idea what it would mean for my family and for Nate and then especially for me.–{ which was just as well, since then I had no preconceived ideas about his abilities or my own to handle this. Or lack thereof.
I want to write the book that would’ve given me a head start, or at least a head’s up, on following my own ideas and intuition regarding my son; his opportunities, his choices, his education etc. I have always hoped for Nate to have the same chances and choices, my first son Ross (and my subsequent other two sons) expected to have. I found out right away that there were plenty of people, nurses, educators, etc who had ‘plenty ‘ of preconceived notions of what Nate would be able to do, and therefore the choices he would be able to have and the doors of opportunity that would be open to him,
Here I was rejoicing in Nate’s birth, and trying to educate myself on kids ‘like” Nate, while the rest of our world = ,and with very few exceptions,-were bound and determined to let Mark and I know all kinds of irrelevant things that this ‘day old ‘ baby would ‘never ‘ be able to do.
I’ve met enough parents of special kids, or kids with ‘different types of learning styles to know we’ve all…..
….Been There - Felt and Done That...
I don’t know about you but sometimes having a child with special needs feels like you’ve entered The ‘Twilight Zone’ .
- everything that you do – feels like it's too little, and too late.
When, actually, we should be patting ourselves on the back for making a ‘new’ discovery –
but instead we spend time beating ourselves up
for not having figured it out sooner.
So now you’ve gone from the excitement of finding a new idea,
to ‘bad mother’ – in seconds flat.
why didn’t you figure this out sooner’ ?.
Time seems so precious that any lost time is terrible . a lost opportunity.
Remember the wizard of oz, when the neighbor turns into the witch while she’s pedaling her bicycle. There’s a song that plays in the back ground. That’s the sound I usually play in my head at these moments. It’s like you can’t peddle fast enough.
You don’t need to do this to yourself. We are our own worst enemy.
So take a real deep breath and relax. . . . . .
It feels as if there’s too much to do, and too little time.
But there is.
Time is on our side.
And patience is definitely a virtue you will come to make your friend. and eventually your bff
here are some of the False imprints we put on ourselves.
They are the experts – they must know better. (who ever the proverbial THEY are???)
What do I know I studied _____{fill in the blank}.
They have a degree (doctorate) in education, (inclusion, etc).
The truth is—yes, often you do know better.
Your are the expert on your child.
You know things that he/she will/can do , that no one else knows.
You spend the most time with him, know his/her likes and dislikes.
and YIKES . . . . . .what a responsibility.
Talk about pressure.
If you deign to take a break,, what opportunities are passing you by??!!
Try your best not to get in your own way.
Don’t make your best not good enough. - There is a learning curve here.
No one, not even the pro’s know what to do – exactly and when to do it.
Just like our typical children, each child with special needs is different, has his/her own personality, likes and dislikes.
Remember knowledge is power, and you can only learn as fast as you can, so try not to be your won worst enemy.
I’m not suggesting we don’t do therapy, don’t test, research or tutor. . . god knows where I’d be without my 2am searches on the internet, but as we finally come to know -
We are our child’s best advocate – and the best researcher he could possibly have.
We may not ultimately be our child’s best teacher, but we can be his teacher’s best resource. We can do research, find age appropriate reading – make copies, enlarge information, ask for funding for extra help, search the internet for information or source material. Find or make books on tape etc., - be a jack of all trades.
We are the thread that carries throughout. With our child, and with the team, day to day and from year to year.
“We tried this, last year, it didn’t work….it worked in English – can we use the same skills in science…..He/she responded to this – can we use this method in math. His/her favorite thing in the world is star wars, elmo, pokemon, (fill in the blank )
– how about star wars math?...... Use his or her favorite thing as a hook, or incitement to get them interested in something they would otherwise tune out or say no to.
The BIG PICTURE – THAT’S OUR JOB.
Where do we want to end up at the end of the day . . . where are we going.
What’s the important piece of this lesson. Is it writing your name in the upper right hand corner of the page or answering the question.
Does the answer need to be written – can it be multiple choice, done on the computer –
can we pick out the words on cut out paper – or with picture clues, etc.
My hope is that this book will give you the permission you seek and teach you how to use your other skills, as a parent, business professional, housewife or shoe salesman to help you to help your child.
There are no absolutes here. It’s definitely trial and error and what works one day may not work the next. But the same can be said for all children – learning is an ongoing an ananamorphosis process – your ideas and flexibility will be seen as an asset when given the chance.
Never does not mean Never...... Never will come to mean.... Not Yet.
It has for me, and it will for you.
You will need to learn to pick your battles. Every thing is not as important as the next thing.
Right away does not ,and can’t always mean now. You need to remember that 'they' almost always have good intentions and you’ll lose too much credibility if you approach the schools this way.
Truthfully –they do have our child’s best interest at heart. Sometimes good intentions are not enough – I agree – but their motives are in the right place – new things and change are hard for most adults – and at it’s core that is what we’re asking for – change. Of attitude, expectations, performance, outcome etc. They are not the enemy. They don’t have to like you – respecting your opinion and intentions would be nice – but your not looking for a date to the prom – you want to be a valued member of the team. This is a lot easier to accomplish then getting anyone to admit that you’re right – or to make it all better - etc. that’s not what this Is about. It’s about getting your child the kind of help he/she needs at this moment in time. Remember their needs will change – as it would for any child - with the passage of time.
Once you've successfully created your first AHA Moment, you will be hooked! I know I was - and I still am!
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